- DIE TRYING
- Posts
- DIE TRYING 011
DIE TRYING 011
Publish, Project or Perish
Michael Barnes
November 15, 2025
In partnership with
Hey! I’m that guy trying to sell my latest screenplay, publish it as a novel or die trying.
In DIE TRYING, you will get an unvarnished look at a bitterly honest writer struggling to make it. No name-dropping or Hollywood phoniness. Just the facts ma’am on what the media landscape really is like behind the curtain.
In TODAY’S ISSUE, we help you write a memorable bio to send out to executives with your script.
The best marketing ideas come from marketers who live it.
That’s what this newsletter delivers.
The Marketing Millennials is a look inside what’s working right now for other marketers. No theory. No fluff. Just real insights and ideas you can actually use—from marketers who’ve been there, done that, and are sharing the playbook.
Every newsletter is written by Daniel Murray, a marketer obsessed with what goes into great marketing. Expect fresh takes, hot topics, and the kind of stuff you’ll want to steal for your next campaign.
Because marketing shouldn’t feel like guesswork. And you shouldn’t have to dig for the good stuff.
 | HOW TO CRAFT A BIO THAT WILL HUMP THE EXECUTIVE’S LEG |  |
My script is going out to executives, and I was asked to write a bio.
Roadmap Writers gave me the ground rules.
Six sentences, eight at most. Written in the third person with a different idea in each sentence. Not a mini-memoir or boring thematic recitation.
In the first sentence, shoot the flare and get the exec’s attention. State where you live and what genre you write in.
In number two, put the zesty meat between the hot dog bun. This is the most important one where you make your main point with flair. The executive might not read beyond this, so make sure this is your beachfront property with flood insurance.
Open your trench coat and flash the executive with the most interesting and vulnerable reasons why they should read your script. Bare your soul strategically without being creepy.
In the third sentence, explore your theme. Be specific and state WHY this theme is important to you.
NO: I was a high school outsider who escaped in movies.
YES: After watching Cuaron’s Y tu mamá también in high school, I learned to call my bully a dog humper six ways to Sunday in Spanish.
In sentence number four, describe where you got your screenwriting training. If you’re self-taught, shout out your fav screenwriting YouTuber who helped along the way.
Describe your accomplishments and accolades in sentence number five. Brag without sounding like an annoying prig.
Finally, in the last sentence, write what you want to leave the executive with. Plant a seed in his or her mind that will make they say, “Oh yeah, her” when they finally pick up your script later.
You want your finale to be the cute labradoodle humping the executive’s leg without peeing on their trousers.
Should you tag your identity politics?
The fact that you’re minority queer is less interesting than saying you're going to be brown William Burroughs doing William Tell and blow the apple off the executive’s head with the script you fire from your gun.
Wait, don’t do the last sentence…big time bad advice!
Just be more interesting than citing intersectionality without showing the blood-oozing scars you’ve lived the damn thing.
Notes on style? I made mine more Grindhouse Cinema than Merchant Ivory:
How about this?
For the first five readers who forward this email to at least five new people, I will punch up your bio free of charge.
I will offer a homegrown (No AI!) alternate that will get your creative juices flowing.
Hit the forward button and commence dog humping!
Need more DIE TRYING? Join us and subscribe.
Dig this content? Help us build an audience and forward this newsletter to a friend or trusted associate.
See you next week!
